sw00809ekua-page4

Edges of Knowledge


Sunday 2002-05-05     6:45pm
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While I cannot know the nature of your psyche,
I do know--and am constantly learning more--
about the nature of my psyche.
                                 Sadly, one
such piece of knowledge shows how easily
stress unbalances me.
                      Spates of anger
(you may not realize) coming from/ someone
as I, are not, actually, directed toward
the situations, objects, persons they
appear to be; but toward the ventor
of those spates of anger.  They are all,
primordially, transferred epithets.
They are all hurtful evidences of
self-loathing.  They are all representative of
an ingrained psychological malignancy.
                                            Do I
wish I were not so plagued.  Absolutely.


Monday 2002-05-13     7:26pm
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Recently I became a member of
The Confraternity of the Rosary.
                                   About
one week ago I received from them
some literature, among which was
a novena announcement, with 18 possible
intentions attached, with the 18th being
Special Intentions.
                    I am still attempting
to form several relevant to me.  I suspect
I will be fiddling with the wording of these
for some while yet.
                    Roughly, the first is:
That my psyche be healed as regards my
getting "all bent out of shape" when
I am forced by certain circumstances
to expend time & energy hunting and fixing
that which I feel I should not have had
to deal with.  In other words:
                              Let me
always remain calm, not matter what
unexpected task comes my way.
                              The second is:
That The Blessed Virgin go to her Son, my
Lord and Savior, to ask that any evils--
if any there are--others have wished
befall me/ be negated.
                         The third is:  That I
learn to carry those crosses I am given/
silently and joyfully.


Wednesday 2002-05-15     7:24m
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   What a day today was! difficulty after
difficulty! and from my end, failure after
failure.  I just don't know, God; I just
don't know.


Thursday 2002-05-16    12:20pm
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   Have I been irresponsible in my life?  Yes, too often.
Have I been a fool?  Have I been an idiot?  Yes.  Am I
smug about it?  No.


Thursday 2002-05-23     
-
Today I received a conclusions letter from
Dr. M. D. of the Institute on Aging at the
University of Florida regarding the project I
participated in on Saturday, December 9th,
2000.  From whatthis letter revealed, I could
easily see how grandiose my goals were--and
yet are--compared to most other eldering
persons.  I truly am a dreamer.
          Recently I have been taking online IQ
tests with a view toward improving myself
mentally.  One such test I took, on which I
scored 122, placed me in that site's Inspired
Inventor group.  Another such, which I took
last night, surprisingly scoring 132, placed me
in that site's Gifted Group and so among the
top 5%, high enough to be invited to join that
site's Society.  Also, they had a section of 
questions wherein I was able to share my 1370
score on the one GRE exam I have taken, a
score I will ever be pleased with no matter 
how many years I am allowed to live beyond
JUN 09 1984.  . . . .  For whatever it means,
I have scored from 100 to 153 on online IQ
tests I have taken lately.
                              Sadly, however intensely
one dreams, however high one's IQ, if one
does not have wisdom. . . .


Sunday 2002-05-26     6:55pm
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Back in the late mid 1960's, when I was enrolled in
The University of Iowa's Writers' Workshop, I
became convinced it was in what happens to the #'s
we use as they move into the 3rd dimension that the
proof of Fermat's Last Theorem exists; and-- the
residing proof notwithstanding--I am still so convinced.
That is why I found myself one day in Iowa U's Math
Library/ constructing what I hoped would be the basis
for a geometric proof; and that is why some
thirty years later I found myself resdiscovering--as I
latterly learned--Bernoulli's power sets.
   Given this, I tend to believe Fermat actually did/
provide a proof in a margin: that an extremely simple
proof exists, one which keys on: the-nature-of-the-
spaces between each other/ #'s are forced to// once
they rise past the squares level.


Tuesday 2002-06-11     5:20pm
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I am just intelligent enough to want to do
great things;
yet, I am just lacking enough in intelligence
to consistently feel I will never be able to
do great things.

Such frustration, I realize, may well ensure
I will never do great things.  Still, I do
not cease to push forward, in this and that,
to seek here to perfect a talent, and
to seek there to find answers where
it seems on the surface no answers
can be found;
I do not cease attempting to learn, create,
and to share,
always hoping my venturing so
will not only be of value in itself,
but also of value to attending others.


Wednesday 2002-06-12     6:49pm
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As somber as it was, due to our physical, psychical, 
and spiritual ailments, today is our 37th anniversary.


Thursday 2002-06-13     8:53am
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If to be truly an American, one needs to be an entrepreneur,
I am not now nor am ever likely to be truly an American.


Sunday 2002-06-30     6:11pm
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What is my opinion of Rap Music?

All too often it is Negatively Disruptive,
and also Disrespectful,
either in itself,
and/or because of the behaviors it encourages--
due to its structure and content--
in those who are drawn to it.

If I or you (for whatever reason(s))
disrespect any other,
I or you therein allow
any other to likewise disrespect you or me.  




-
Brian A. J. Salchert