sw00810ekua-page5

Edges of Knowledge


Thursday 2002-07-04     3:05pm
-
Welcome to the greatest
nation on Earth,
The United States of America,
for what it's worth.

If I were an entrepreneur,
I would create my own nation;
for that/ I believe/ is the only way
I could fulfill (for me) the promise of
"the pursuit of happiness."

Life?  Liberty?  Yah.

And don't tell me I don't know how good I've got it.
I do know;
and I also know I have had it good, too good,
all my life.
           Not relevant to my
"for what it's worth."


Monday 2002-07-08     8:03pm
-
I have decided not to reveal the details, but
this morning after 8/ I had to call 911
for her.  She is now in SICU.


Tuesday 2002-07-09     6:39pm
-
Janice,

you, time upon time the smile of joy,
I (as well as I am able) do love you;
and can only guess at why you so often
seem unable or unwilling to love your self/
even as I/ too often seem
unable or unwilling to love my self.

If I could have given you
all you wanted, nay, all you needed,
the sorrows abiding in our hearts
would not be, would not be.

But be as you wish;
and God be with you,
and be with me.


Thursday 2002-07-11     7:42am
-
Why am I ever/ on the edge of knowing;
so seldom/ really knowing
until it's/ too late?

                                     6:51pm
-
Looking for me?
I say to you, traveler,
do not look/ in the real world.


Sunday 2002-07-14     6:39pm
-
 My Janice

When Janice was young,
often she befriended those/
others were reluctant to,
both for them and for herself.
And I, for one, am pleased she did.

And even though our lives together
didn't progress as I hoped they would,
and I was a sleepy-eyed disappointment,
she was, and is, and will ever be
my woman of night, my woman of light, my promise.

- - -
          Dear God,
          You
          Who are always with us,
          even when we choose wrongly,

          please
          make our hearts such
          that we will be always with You.


Thursday 2002-07-18     10:00pm
-
Janice,
you, time upon time the smile of Joy,
so be with God,
and be with me.

[ insert:
  -
  7/12/02       Janice,

  it seems apparent I was not able
    to love you/ as well as/ I ought to have,
  but I did love you as well as I could
  and I do now/ and will continue to
  love you as well as I am able.
  Certainly Our Savior, Jesus Christ, loves us.
  Certainly, through Him, all are forgiven.
  So be in God. ]


Friday 2002-07-19     7:17pm
-
   Janice's spirit went home to heaven
at 9:38pm the Shands at AGH people say--
about the time I was placing the 7/12/02
words above on this page.  Definitely,
I remember my cursor/ being in the lower left
corner 1t 9:57pm, and that I (from an urge
indefinable) slowly moved that cursor
toward the top center of the screen
with the angle of its rise sharpening as it went,
and that I felt it represented so
Janice's spirit ascending.  And today
I thought:
                  So,
                  go Janice,
                  smile before God.

                  I am sure
                  He/
                  will be pleased.


Wednesday 2002-07-24     6:55pm
-
   The day Janice's spirit moved on,
I visited her twice: once in the morning
and once in the early evening.
In the morning I did speak to her
but not a lot, and I do not recall
what I said.  I do know I sat
in a chair near her and
silently prayed Mary's rosary.
In the evening/ God gave my the courage/
to say more to her.  I am certain I said
what I had written on the 12th:
                                        Janice,
it seems apparent I was not able
to love you/ as well as/ I ought to have
but I did love you as well as I could
and I do now/ and will continue to
love you as well as I am able.
Certainly Our Savior, Jesus Christ, loves us.
Certainly, through Him, all are forgiven.
So be in God.
                         And I did immediately
thereafter say a "Hail Mary" to her.
And although I was not with her
the moment of her passing,
at the time I decided to leave,
I placed my left hand/
softly/ on her forehead,
and said to her:
"Good night, Janice."
= = =



Brian A. J. Salchert